I have numerous water-filled jars of philodendrons here in my southern California sun-filled kitchen. In Brooklyn, I’ve tried to grow this "easy" plant with little success. They were alive, but whispered for me to cut their life short. I do almost nothing to help them along here in LA. They’re in a jar with water. They get glorious amounts of sun. They take exactly what they need and leave the rest. Their thirsty roots grow fast and strong; I can see them blossoming inside the glass. Their leaves are vivacious and springy and perpetually unfurl. I refill the water once a month, when it’s low in the jar or when I feel like it. Done. 

They are rabid leaf makers, growing and flourishing and succeeding beyond belief. I need to hand out their babies so my kitchen doesn’t get overgrown. I’ll wake up one morning and they’ll be petting my cheek, all the way to the bedroom. I’ll sell my screenplay to David Cronenberg.

For success, you only need a few strong ingredients in the right ratio to gain desirable results.